Quickies
Let’s talk “Quickies!”
Intimacy with your partner can look a million different ways and a quick sexual connection is certainly one of them.
A quickie is the term given to sex that is just that – quick.
There are a lot of seasons in life when you only have 5 minutes to get it on and 5 minutes is better than nothing. A brief sexual encounter can infuse your relationship with a spurt of sexual energy. This energy helps keep the two of you connected to each other until you have time and space for a longer intimacy date.
Let’s be real. Quickies don’t have to be the best sex you ever had together.
In fact, they probably won’t be. It’s best if expectations are reasonable and the focus is on bringing your bodies together. This means keeping the focus on pleasurable connection, a little fun and a lot of affectionate playfulness!
Limited time equals minimal foreplay or warming up activities. This likely means that not everyone may orgasm. (especially women). Agree ahead of time that this is okay for both partners.
Orgasm isn’t necessarily the goal here.
Absolutely awesome if it happens, but absolutely okay if it doesn’t.
As is often said, timing is everything. There are times when your arousal may be speedier, such as after exercising or earlier in the day. Engaging in a quickie at these times may help increase pleasure and fun.
Sometimes, you and your partner may have different ideas about what a quickie looks like or feels like. This is normal. If you have never talked about it, take some time to communicate with each other about what feels pleasurable and what doesn’t. You might want to use this post to jump start the conversation. Together, come up with two or three scenarios that feel comfortable, feasible and fun! Ideally, this is an open-ended conversation that you will circle back to often and at different seasons in your relationship.
Think outside your typical sex framework.
Especially if intercourse is your usual sexual go-to, consider new ways to pleasure each other. Perhaps try something new? Like meeting up in the shower, keeping most of your clothes on, or just using your hands. Use your imagination!
Rather listen to this topic?
Permission for Pleasure Podcast: Episode 23
